Anyone who knows me knows I am not a fancy person. I rather slink into a pair of comfy leggings and a cotton t-shirt than schlep on a pair of dress slacks and suit jacket. I don't mind wearing a dress...if it's a Maxi dress or equivalent, but you're not likely to find me in a fitted "sexy" dress.
It's not that I dislike dressing up, I just find that being dressed to the nines often means I'm going to spend a lot of time being uncomfortable. Shifting a bra that doesn't want to stay hidden or hiking up pants that don't sit comfortably unless you plan on being completely stationary. (I have a bubble butt so pants rarely fit the badonkadonk while remaining fitted around the waste. I ALWAYS get the dreaded gap where you could slide a small pillow between my back and the pants. OBNOXIOUS)
Anyways, I was having a particularly good outfit day, the kind of day where you feel like you should find someplace to go, someplace worthy of your outfit even though you really don't have anywhere you NEED to be. I decided to stop at Wegmans for a few odds and ends. I happened to see someone I went to high school with, though thankfully I don't think she saw me.
I should have been happy simply for the fact that I ran into someone I knew while looking somewhat put together. Normally I run into my entire graduating class when I haven't slept the night before, my hair looks like an entire family of rats made a nest in it, and the bags under my eyes are dark enough to make someone think I had been on the losing end of a fist fight. Not today, today I looked good. Until I saw her.
Perfect hair, makeup that looked like it was applied professionally, and an outfit that was clearly peeled from the centerfold of Vogue Magazine. It was simple yet gorgeous, and she looked amazing in it.
I. Looked. Atrocious.
I quickly shimmied down the aisle squeezing my cart handle like it was going to offer me some type of protection. Like I needed protection. It's silly, I know.
I've been in a place in my life where I feel like changes are necessary. Not that my outfit preferences are going to change, I'll likely always be a comfort over style type of gal, but I've sunk into this routine of someone I said I would never be. I always told my parents I could never work a 9 to 5 office job, doing the same things day in and day out. I need variation. I need the freedom to live without working to live. I know that's a tall order, but I'm almost 30 and I feel like continuing to mosey down the same path is only going to lead me to look back and be super bummed out.
What does this have to do with rocking a not so stellar outfit and running into an old classmate? Honestly, it has less to do with the outfit and more to do with an internal disappointment. I want to be comfortable, confident with who I am and where I am in life when I casually bump into someone I know. I don't want to feel like I need to avoid saying 'hello' to avoid talking about what I do for a living (not that there’s anything wrong with marketing) or what I've been up to since graduating. Though, I will proudly tell anyone and everyone that I am a mother to the most precious and beautiful little girl (I'm not bias or anything.)
As I've been told countless times, I need to stop comparing myself to others. I have walked a somewhat tumultuous path the last several years, and I need to give myself props where props are due. I also need to remember that goals aren't obtained overnight. They take time and if I’m taking steps towards the changes I need to make, I should be pleased as punch.
Oh. And maybe I need to think about upgrading the leggings and t-shirts...maybe leggings and sweaters. You know, since fall is coming! ha ha!