Recently someone asked me why I downgraded my vehicle from a tricked out Ford Escape to a Ford Focus with barely any bells and whistles. The answer is simple: I realized I had absolutely no need for the extra features and I didn’t want to pay more just to say I had something when I rarely, if ever, used the them. I mean come on, how many times do you adjust your seat? and are your text messages really that important that you need the car to read them to you as they come in?
I am not a materialistic person and I don’t really care what others think of my bare bones Ford Focus. It links to my phone for music and I can accept calls over the system while driving, if need be. It gets me from point A to point B just fine, and has a small back-up camera I can use if I feel I need to. Not only am I saving money on my car payment, insurance and gas but I am pleased and punch with the simplicity of my car. Tim has also stopped referring to my car as the "space ship" because of all the buttons and features on the dashboard.
This conversation reminds me of another conversation Tim and I had not too long ago. We had just spent the day around expensive cars and people wearing clothes that probably cost more than my entire wardrobe combined. I had asked my husband if he thought we were doing it all wrong. He looked at me and said “even if you had an unlimited supply of money, we would still live in the same house and you would drive the same car. If anything, maybe we would move to the country and have a boatload of land with horses and a shit-ton of rescue dogs. You’re just not the type of person that would visibly wear your money.”
It’s true. If I suddenly became a millionaire I would finish a few projects around the house, pay off all my bills and just continue living as I always have.
People say “well you can’t take it with you when you die” and obviously that’s absolutely true, but I would rather spend money on experiences than material things. I’d love to sponsor a cancer patients dream vacation to anywhere in the world, or fund an entire year of medical expenses for a rural animal rescue that receives next to nothing in state funding. I want my stamp on the world to be more than a big house, or a $500 purse with matching wallet.
Am I saying those who choose to spend money on material things are wrong? Absolutely not, by all means, if you have the dough and it makes you happy go for it. All I’m saying is I personally don't find enjoyment in material things that I really don't need or don't benefit from. Besides, looks can be deceiving and while money can certainly make life easier, you can't buy happiness. There is so much more to life than appearances and appearance are often a lie.
So...It's 9:50PM and the little princess has been asleep in her crib for about a half hour. I should be getting ready for bed, but instead here I sit. I cranked out a few more pages in the book (still without a title) and now I am contemplating how on earth anyone has more than one kiddo at a time. I mean, I love my Shelby babe, and I wouldn't give her back for anything, but she is a time consuming sponge!
Working full-time, writing this book, maintaining a household (which lets be frank, the house kind of looks like a bomb went off more often than not, lately) taking care of the fur kids, and lets not forget finding time to do the necessities like eat and take a shower, there is literally zero time left in a day. Sometimes I don't even know how I'm going to get the stuff done that needs to get done, forget about "extras."
In this regard, I am envious of my husband. Having a kiddo changes the whole family dynamic for sure, but it undoubtedly changes things for the momma more than the daddio. I can't even fathom working a full day and then giving up more time with my babe to do something else like get a much needed massage ( I use to go routinely to help manage the pain from Fibromyalgia). Hubby doesn't even think twice to drop off the little bean at her great aunties or gammy's house so he can spend 2 hours looking for lost golf balls. Why is that?
I always thought I would be one of those moms that was able to find an awesome balance pretty quickly and get back to my "normal" routine soon after baby came. Ha, who was I kidding! I would love to get back into the rescue world like I was before or even spend half the time I spent before working on new blog material, but I just can't justify giving up the time with Shelby to do these things. I know she is only going to be this little for so long and I don't want to spend more time away from her than I have too.
Take today for example, I have awful allergies; I'm talking red nose, watery eyes, and sneezes that could stir the dead, so it wasn't a huge surprise that I woke up with a wonker of a sinus headache this morning. Hubby was off to bowl qualifiers for Beat the Champ (a local bowling TV show) so it was just me and the kiddo. She nodded off around 9:30AM but I couldn't bring myself to put her in the swing, or her crib, so I could take something and lay down to try and kick the headache. I know she isn't going to fall asleep on me for very long so I snuggled her instead. Is this normal? I can't be the only mom that does stuff like this. I've even put off friends, simply because I don't want to leave the peanut. Please tell me I'm not alone...
Now it's 10:10 and I really need to get to bed...little monster has been having a few rough nights and with my luck she'll be up in an hour or two and I'll find myself wishing I had gone to bed when she did.
PS- I totally gave up editing this blog post- sleep time is ranking higher than editing right now, sorry!!!