Life, Fur & Adventure
  • Life & Adventure Blog
  • Hire Me
  • Fur Blog
  • Lost in the Pages
  • BT Creatives
  • About

Life, Fur & Adventure

A Different Kind Of Mother's Day

5/9/2016

0 Comments

 
We are the forgotten ones, the mother's who grieve with smiles on our faces, but sorrow in our hearts.

It's ironic how life changes your perspective on things. I never thought of Mother's Day as anything more than a day to celebrate all the mommies with kiddos. My mind never bridged the gap between the women who've lost children and the kind of sorrow they must feel on a day such as Mother's Day. Until, I became one of them. 

It was a struggle to get through the day. There were several moments when it was hard to fight back the tears, but the guilt of being a "debbie downer" on a day that's supposed to be filled with happiness and love, was enough to keep the tears at bay. Don't get me wrong, I loved celebrating my mother, mother-in-law and my sister-in-law who gave us my niece, Audrianna, but the reality that my little bundle didn't make it to this earth to celebrate with us, well, it's heartbreaking. 

I have 3 tattoos all of which hold some meaning and importance in my life. The first; a butterfly with pink highlighting on my right wrist symbolizing hope, life and endurance.  The second; paw prints walking alongside my footprints, surrounded by little hearts on the top of my right foot, and the third of a dog and cat silhouette in the shape of a heart, on my left wrist. I decided I wanted a fourth tattoo, but didn’t know what I wanted until I weathered one of the worst experiences of my life, a miscarriage at 13 weeks. A miscarriage that continued to rock my world for 6 months after we first learned our baby was gone.  

Shortly after the ordeal began the idea of a tattoo surfaced, but I was distracted by a phantom second pregnancy, a multitude of doctors appointments, weekly blood draws, and eventually a second surgery. Then, before I knew it,  my due date was right around the corner as was Mother's Day. The sadness and grief I thought I had moved passed was all too present again, and I wanted this Mother's Day to still be special so, the idea of a tattoo became even more important. It would serve as a way to celebrate the life that grew inside me for 13 weeks, but also bring a sad chapter of my life to a close.  

On Saturday, two days after my due date and a day before Mother's Day, my little angel who was already a permanent resident in my heart became a permanent image on my body as well. I couldn't have asked for it to turn out any better than it did; I love it. 

Everyone grieves differently, there is no right or wrong way to mourn a life lost. This tattoo is exactly what I needed to close a door, but never forget, a sad chapter in my book. It's time for a new chapter. 
"Babies lost in the womb were never touched by fear, they were never cold, never hungry, never alone and most importantly, always knew love." - unknown
Picture
Picture
0 Comments



Leave a Reply.

    RSS Feed


    Picture

    Author

    #Writer, #blogger and avid reader. #Animal advocate, fur mom and devoted wife. Just your run of the mill #dreamer, chasing her dreams and hoping for the best.


    Currently Reading: 

    Archives

    March 2020
    February 2020
    January 2020
    December 2019
    August 2019
    July 2019
    June 2019
    May 2019
    April 2019
    January 2019
    December 2018
    October 2018
    September 2018
    August 2018
    July 2018
    June 2018
    May 2018
    April 2018
    March 2018
    February 2018
    January 2018
    December 2017
    November 2017
    October 2017
    September 2017
    August 2017
    July 2017
    June 2017
    May 2017
    March 2017
    January 2017
    December 2016
    November 2016
    October 2016
    September 2016
    August 2016
    June 2016
    May 2016
    April 2016
    March 2016
    February 2016
    January 2016
    December 2015
    November 2015
    July 2015
    April 2015


    Free-Hit-Counters.net
    Submit
    Tweets by @BriFinken
Powered by Create your own unique website with customizable templates.
  • Life & Adventure Blog
  • Hire Me
  • Fur Blog
  • Lost in the Pages
  • BT Creatives
  • About